Rosemary, Roast, and Ramsay

Just after posting my last, (Apparently Controversial) Post…My computer informed me that it had a bug, and was taking a dive…It did, and now two days later, and the third computer for this year, I am posting an entirely different type of “Pork Spending”  Roast.

Needles to say, as I discovered my computer was dieing  just as I was preparing this one, I was not feeling all that high on the hog. So, with no immediate consoling thoughts of getting back online anytime soon, I didn’t bother to take any finished product photos of the meal.

As far as a long, descriptive recipe or how to  instructions, there is probably not a lot I can tell you that the photo doesn’t already show. And as for how good it looked, and tasted when I took it out of the oven, I guess you’ll just have to trust me when I say, it was no pig in a poke. In fact, we thoroughly enjoyed it, despite weighty thoughts of a roasted computer. It actually took my mind off of my loss, at least as long as I was rooting around cooking, and eating the dish.     As I said the photo pretty much speaks for itself, though for the sake of a new blog entry, I will try unearthing, and walking you through the meat and potatoes of porky’s preparation. And, please forgive me if I tend to grunt a little, as I am working with a much slower computer than I had two days ago. But, thankfully, you didn’t have to listen to all my squealing prior to getting this pig of a computer out of the pin, and back online.

Here goes:

This little Piggy went to market:This little Piggy->                            Tried to roamThis little Piggy took my money->

And this little Piggy, he de-boned ->

And, of course, that’s when this little Piggy went Wee Wee Wee….

All The Way Home ->

I  know. Disgusting, right?

So,  Obviously, as pictured, I didn’t hog tie this one with any Kitchen Twine. Nor did I sear it. I just took my frustrations about my computer out on the roast by running it through with my, Gordon Ramsay pig sticker ( just kidding, I couldn’t even afford one of his cheap K-Mart knives if I wanted to after buying the new computer)…And sandwiched four sliced open cloves of garlic between two celery sticks, and slipped them through the hole.

I then threaded a few stems of fresh rosemary through the bore as well. Next I greased the pig in Olive Oil, perched it on a platform of carrots, celery, and onions, showered it with cracked black pepper, kosher salt, smoked paprika, and onion powder, and tucked it all in with chunks of white potatoes, and onions. After it was in, roasting at325 Fahrenheit for 45 minutes or so, I sliced up a scallion, sprinkled it over the top, squeezed the juice of half a lime onto it, and put it back into the oven for 10 minutes more.

I’ll admit, I am a little porked at myself for not taking any “After” photos…but, I guess you’ll have to use your imagination as how it turned out, and how delicious it was…Or, you could cook yourself one.

Oh, and I’ll be taking off to K-Mart to buy one of every model of Gordon Ramsay’s cook ware and appliances…When Pigs Fly

Well, that’s my pork spending, pig sticking, rump roasted pig-tale, and I’m sticking to it…

Oh, I might add, and admit, I did go to K-Mart to check out, hotdog, Gordo Rambo’s new line of  cookware…And though I salute his affordably priced marketing savvy, in this piggish economy, to be  frank, it all looked like a bunch of Stainless Steel electro-plated Easy Bake Oven stuff to me. Well, guess I’ve grunted about enough for one post…

Oink Oink!!!







  1. Sorry about your comuter. I had problems with mine a month ago. It had a virus. I had to save everything, and then take the computer back to its original settings. I then had to download all the programs that were wiped like adobe and flash player. I think I may have to follow your recipe. I love to cook, and I love to use garlic, but I’ve never used smoked paprika. I may have to try it. Everything looks good even before cooking. I’ll bet it was great. Take care.


  2. Sorry to hear about your computer troubles, Paul. I can imagine the frustration! As for the piggies, I’m in their corner today…have a soft spot for them, enhanced by the movie ‘Babe’ which is coming to mind :-)


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